Rock Star Rookies and the Lovable Groupie: One Story – Multiple Bands – Part I


“…and suddenly all those songs were about you…”

When I’ve first started writing about the men that I’ve loved over the years, I had trouble developing a sequence, an order, a series of chronological events that connected one to another. I had trouble doing what anyone who has ever laid their fingers on a keyboard or pointed a pen to paper old school style has had trouble doing (and notice I didn’t say or call myself a writer), I had trouble developing a story.

I had chapters, ideas and a direction that I felt made my story different, or at least had an angle that was different, but I had trouble organizing the individual stories about the men I loved, could have loved and wanted to love into ONE STORY.

How do I tell ONE story about them when the only Kevin Bacon in this crazy circle of relationship faux pas is me?

The logical place to start would be at the beginning. The beginning of my life in dating. The beginning when I was younger, naive, fly by the seat of my pants, I LOVE HIM beginning. The beginning when I talk about how I didn’t know any better and ending with me being a 30­ something…something?!

But the beginning isn’t where the idea of this blog was born. The idea of this blog was born after my encounters with the men that I already discussed here and here. The last two that somehow did me in. So instead, I started from the end, when I was still sad and mad and pissed from my diss that the only logical thing would have been to start at the end, because the end was my then reality.

Then I got over that and found myself wanting to continue talking about these men who I shared time, and in a way my life with.

As I continued, I found myself asking the question – How do I connect multiple encounters with the same type of men who have more in common than me? How do I connect the men who can be grouped together not only because they share the same attributes, the same fire, the same passion, the same (dare I say), occupation, but because my time with them was so eerily similar?

In short, How do I write ONE story about all the rock stars that I dated when I could theoretical make more than one band?

Published by


J is a happily single 30-something currently documenting her stories of love and loss. Her blog, “I Quit Dating” features excerpts of her journey as she reflects on the lessons learned from the men she loved. A complete collection of essays detailing her walk away from finding Mr. Right in order to pursue a more fulfilled life will be self-published next year. She recently moved from Los Angeles to New York. Contact: iquitdating (@)

Please Share Your Thoughts

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s