I Love What You Hate – III

Instead of talking about the things we hated, we talked about the things we loved, the things we had in common, the things we talked about and the things we shared until we not only loved the things we loved, but we loved each other.

The idea of “finding someone who hates the things that you hate” was something that I couldn’t shake.

I started talking to people and asking if they were aware of this. I couldn’t be the only one in the dark, could I?

The results were interesting:

Another co-worker married for 20+ years said, “Absolutely! My wife and I are haters. We hate everything!”

I then asked a couple who have been dating for 2+ years and another newly engaged. They both pondered, but after a beat they agreed that they had similar dislikes to their partners and felt that this concept would be advantageous in a relationship.

And lastly,  I  asked my contemporaries, the single people!

And both people I asked said what I most feared.

They both said, “I don’t really hate anything.”

 

 

I Love That You Hate What I Hate – II

I began thinking of all the times I bonded with a stranger over varied, somewhat superficial interests. What bands we liked, what our favorite foods were, what we liked to do in our spare time. We’d talk, compare notes, makes plans around our mutual interests, these interests connecting me to this person I liked in hopes that this person would then like me.

Until recently when I started asking myself, How many dates did I go on with these people before we talked about the things we not only disliked, but the things we HATED?

Did we ever?

And for the sake of this argument, if we did, was I ever confident enough to talk with conviction about what I hated even if that meant that this new person wouldn’t like me anymore?

Did I ever have the balls to say, “You know what? I F***K** HATE THAT SH*T instead of “I’d totally do that WITH YOU!”

Probably Not.